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Thursday, March 11, 2010

Feminism and the feelings of men

A common complaint by women is that "men are not connected to their feelings". This complaint is of course invalid and misandrist. Men DO have feelings, but sometimes they choose different ways to express them, and this is something that those women cannot understand. So it isn't that men don't have feelings, it is the limitations of women that are not capable of understanding men. As always, they would blame men for everything, regadrless of the facts.


So, today I am going to talk about my own feelings as a men regarding feminism, in a lanaguage that women are able to understand.

The first emotion I feel when I hear anything that has anything to do with feminism is anger. A very powerful, deep feeling of anger. Now let's try to analyze that. Why am I so angry at feminist?
Is it because I am a women hater? Is it because I had a bad mother? is it because I am a psycho?
Well the answers to this are No No and No. On the contrary. I love other human beings, I have a wonderful mother, and I just an ordinary person. Why then, am I feeling such a powerful anger about the issue of feminism?

Well, there are many possible reasons why people would feel angry about things. For example, if you had a dream and someone has broken it, you are very likely to feel anger towards that person or entity. If you had something of value that you loved, and it was taken away from you, it would be very strange if you didn't feel anger toeards those who took this precious thing from you.

And guess what? this is exactly what feminist did. Having been born in the end of the 1970's, I have grown up in a feminism-free atmosphere. I remember my childhood as great. Feminism hasn't really gained much foothold in Israel until the 1990's. Israel has been a wonderful place to grow up in, despite all the security issues of the middle east. Society was healthy. Families were strong. Divorce has not been as common as it is today. Misandry in Israeli society and in the Israeli media did not exist until the 1990's.

As most of my peers, I have dreamed about the day where I would become an adult, and my time will come to have my own beloved wife and adorable children. I could not wait to have my own family. It was something that I precieved as a natural stage in my development as a human being.

Back then, I loved my country very much, and had a string Patriotic feeling about it. I felt thankful for all the good things my country has given me, and the love to my coutry was an essential part of my identity.

But as I was growing up, things began to change. The newspapers and the TV were suddently filled with all kinds of wierd stories about poor women being battered and abused by their husbands. The Israeli government started making all kinds of wierd laws against men, who were suddently portrayed as the "Enemies of Society". At some point one would feel the need to apologize for having being born with a penis. Divorce rates were on the rise. Israeli courts began to make all those bad policies against men, imposing impossible child support amounts on them, not allowing them to see their children, etc. False Domestic violence and Rape accusations became the new trend. Worst of all, the perception of family in the Israeli society has changed. Families weakend a great deal, and the trust between men and women deteriorated.

When I grew up, I realized that the Israeli family is not what it used to be. I have known some men whose life has been completly destroyed by the Israeli family courts. Their children were taken away from them, thwe ex-wife interfered with visitation rights, one of them has even been put on a criminal charges because his ex filled fase domestic violenbce allegations against him.
All were financially ruined.

Having seen all this, I was in a serious crisis. I really wanted a family, but I feared that my fate would become similar to the fate of those men I knew. At some point my childhood friends began to get married, and in recent years some of them are going on divorce, experiencing all the terrible things that the Israeli Divorce Industry has to offer.

After a long process I decided that I have no choice but to give up my dream and give up the idea of having a family of my own altogether. Later on I realized that I was not alone. Many men around the world are facing similar dillemas, and end up making the same decisions. This is called the "Marriage Strike".

On the way, I gradually began to lose trust in the whole governmental systems in my country. The government itself, the police, the courts, the welfare systems, are all feminist secret agents now, imposing their evil agenda. The love I felt to my country began depreciating. How can I love such an evil country, that takes away my most basic right, to have a family of my own?

So this is my story. This is how I lost my dream to have a family of my own, abd the country that I loved. So no wonder than I am angry. Feminism has brought a social disaster on us. Feminism is destroying famlies, and the social fab-ric as a result. So there you go. I was personally hurt and I am angry, just like any other person in my situation would have been.



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15 comments:

  1. To be honest not to have your dream come true is a blessing. Had you married your would have discovered that what you had achieved was not a dream but a nightmare.

    Marriage is the end of a man's life. To be married is not to gain but to loose everything. Accept my friend these words from me. I have now been married for over 32 years. Not for one moment during that time has it been anything but a living hell. This was so intense I hated my very existence and thought of death as a friend that would bring blessed release.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for the insight.....indeed under the current circumstances marriage is totally not an option for any man as I see it....

    I hear many men talking the way you do, and I hope more younger men will talk to the older, more experienced guys who have already been "there" and learn from their experience.

    And still, losing a dream....it's not easy.

    ReplyDelete
  3. In the end I think that dream will always be lost no matter what a man does. But for you even though you have lost one dream you have gained the life of a man. Remember a man has more than one dream, more that one ideal and more than one destination. Take courage and find a better fate.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I do not know in what kind of horrible world you both have been living, but I come from Holland and in my cirle of friends and family we have mostly happy marriages with and without children. My parents just celebrated their 53rd anniversary and my 3 sisters and brother each have 3 children and are happily married with partners that are equal in every way. Yet each and all of them realise and respect the difference in the persons and allow for that, they allow their partner to be themselves and speak out for themselves. The rewards of doing that is great and well worth it.
    I never got married, nor have any children, because I have never been able to find the right partner, but that might just be right for me because of the purpose I have here on earth right now.
    Love is the most important thing in all areas and situations and feminism does not have to be a bad thing, but I do agree that is has swung the scales to far to the other side.
    I think though that it will balance itself back again in the near future, but this can only happen in love.
    so set your feelings to love and you will be able to find the things you are longing for, unless you have a purpose here on earth in which case a family might be a difficult thing to handle as well.
    In the case of Israel I cannot help but see some blame in the governments treatment of these rights for women, they simply overdid it in the favor of the women and that simply is not right nor just. And yes I am a woman. 52 years young. Thank you very much.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I enjoyed your post very much and passed it on to the forum at Stand Your Ground (http://standyourground.com). Keep up the good work!

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  8. Rookh:

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  9. That is true. As an author and business man, I can relate to how you said, "A common complaint by women is that "men are not connected to their feelings".". I hope more people discover your blog because you really know what you're talking about. Can't wait to read more from you!

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